We miss you Burnsy

When you’ve just had one of the hardest weeks of your life, and it just happened to contain Thanksgiving Day within it, how do you answer people who ask you how your Thanksgiving was?

One week ago today, the world suffered a terrible loss as Sean Burns passed away. Known to his friends as Burnsy (as much as he might have hated that name) he was a wonderful friend who will truly be missed by all who knew him.

It is so difficult to put into words how I am currently feeling. I feel so strange when people ask how my Thanksgiving was. If I am truthful, then it is likely I am going to start crying as I try to explain why it was an incredibly tough day this year. And that is not something that I care to do with just any random person that asks. But, at the same time I don’t feel right acting as though nothing unusual happened. It would be an insult to Burnsy's memory to pretend that all was well. To really think about it though, my Thanksgiving was a wonderful day, even if it was filled with sadness. I spent it with a large group of my friends, all brought together by love for a fallen friend. It was experience that I would never wish on someone, because I would never wish for someone to have to experience this pain. But, at the same time, it was an experience that I will forever treasure and cherish. It was a day filled with such sadness and tears, but at the same time a day filled with such wonderful memories and love. It was a day when a group of friends decided to forgo Thanksgiving with their own families, no matter how tough that was, so that they could be together to celebrate and remember their lost friend. It was a day that would never have happened had Sean not been a part of our lives. It was a day that I will always be thankful for.

At this point in our lives, we don't expect to lose friends to death. Thirty is too young to go. It made me realize just how often I've taken my friends for granted; how I've always expected that they will be there, no matter what. I consider myself to be very lucky to have the group of friends that I've got, and I am going to do my best to not neglect those relationships in the future. And I consider myself lucky to have known Burnsy, even it was wasn't for nearly long enough.

My thoughts are so jumbled right now, I'm not even sure if this post makes any sense. I'm sure with time my brain will start to function normally again, but for now, this is the best I can do.

We all love you and miss you buddy. It hurts so bad to have lost you so soon.